Mini Date Lesson #4: Meet In A Public Place To Talk (And Listen)

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Perhaps this learning point is obvious to other folks, and it took me a while to refine so perhaps it's useful to others.Mini Dates worked best when I chose public places with other people around, where I felt completely safe, and where it was easy to have a conversation and interact.  Quieter bars, restaurants that didn't mind if we just had coffee, and coffee shops were perfect.If 15 minutes had elapsed and I hadn't said anything about myself, I'd say: "I'm really enjoying hearing about you. And I have a tendency to not talk about myself enough, especially when I'm meeting new people. What would you like to hear about me in the next few minutes?" I got asked a lot of cool questions from this open-ended question! Sometimes people would just turn my own previous inquiries on me, which was fine, too.However, if my date replied with, "Oh, it's OK. I don't mind just talking about me," this was a deal-breaker. It turned out to be a very good indicator that by date number 4, he still wouldn't have asked anything about me or would barely let me get in word.I liked frequenting places where the staff recognized me because it made me feel more confident.I stayed about from movies and concerts because they didn't allow for enough interaction and a brief enough meeting. Dinners are more interactive usually, but they're still not a short enough meeting for a Mini date.And of course I kept it public: absolutely no homes, work places, or secluded spots. The one time I strayed from this guideline, I ended up in an unpleasant but recoverable situation.-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Read more in this series:

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Mini Date Lesson #5: A Sense of Abundance and Dating
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Mini Date Lesson #3: Choose Your Conversation Topics Wisely